Site founder and creator Lee Block, a writer and new media specialist, gets it. Twice divorced herself, the mom of two saw a need in the post-divorce community and began creating a family of sites centered around the, as he calls it, “re-singled” community. This community doesn’t just include divorced singles, Lee says those who’ve lost a spouse or just left a long term committed relationship can also identify.
We caught up with Block to get the skinny on how the site came to be, what you can expect to get out of joining, and why it’s the new place to be for the “re-singled.” Check out what she had to say!
ESSENCE: What do you feel are the biggest stigmas attached to divorce today?
Block: I think one of the biggest stigmas about divorce today is that it is easier to be divorced than to stay in a marriage. It is harder to get divorced. You have issues you have to deal with in divorce that you don’t have to deal with when you are married. You have to deal with custody, co-parenting, divorce decrees, blended families, being a single parent, finding a job, finding child care and the health and well being of your kids after the trauma of divorce. Divorce is not easy emotionally. It might be easy to get, but emotionally it is harder to do that to stay.
Another stigma is that people that get divorced take the easy way out of a bad situation and that they didn’t work on the marriage. Filing for divorce is never an easy decision and people don’t take it lightly. You don’t go into a marriage thinking you are going to get a divorce, and before filing, a lot of things happen, that those on the outside don’t even know about.
ESSENCE: What was the motivation behind the creation of Post Divorce Dating Club?
Block: To have a place that provided a safe dating experience for people who are re-singled or becoming re-singled. I found that dating after being in a long term relationship is hard, especially with children, so I wanted to create a place that offered support, guidance and a secure feeling for those people that were not brought up in the age of technology to feel like they could be themselves and really find that someone they want to spend time with and possibly marry again.
ESSENCE: What type of divorcee would use your site? Is she a busy mom? Is she looking to remarry fast?
Block: There is no one type of re-single that uses the site. Every type uses it. From stay-at-home moms to custodial dads. We fit every person who is re-singled, which is what makes this site so unique. We are not one size fits all in divorce, just like divorce is not one size fits all. We embrace the fact that each person is an individual with their own life experiences they bring along the way, and we offer each of those individuals their own place on Post-Divorce Dating Club. Our average age is 35 – 55 and some have children and some don’t. We are about a 60/40 split with 60% being women and 40% being men. But, the people on this site don’t have to be heterosexual re-singles. We also have people that are same sex oriented re-singles and have a place for them as well. We are an equal opportunity dating site for all re-singles, regardless of age, gender, ethnicity or sexual preference.
ESSENCE: What can it offer a “re-singled” individual?
Block: The main goal of the site is to build a community of like-minded people where they can learn and grow and interact and feel safe. Safety is so important when you are out there and vulnerable. We offer background checks on our site that you can purchase to make sure that the person you might want to meet is who they say they are.
We are fostering community not only online, but offline. We will be implementing Miixzee’sTM, which will be geographically located in cities across the United States, which will offer seminars, mixers, speed dating, business networking and casual meetings and will give our members and non-members an opportunity to meet and mingle in a more relaxed atmosphere. We want our members to form bonds and friendships.
Do you think dating is harder for those who are divorced or who haven’t been single for many years? Do you recommend other ways to get back out there? Share them below!