Couple-Care is a monthly series highlighting inspiring couples in our community. Each couple discusses how “couple-care” sustains their relationship, the self-care lessons they’ve learned from each other and more.
Although following different career paths, engaged couple Naomi Elizée and Anthony Blue Jr. relate on their passion for connecting with their communities. “Whether it’s a young designer or editor, or someone who’s just trying to come up in the industry, I love giving guidance,” the Davie, South Florida-born fashion editor, tells ESSENCE via Zoom. “I feel like uplifting and being a resource to others is my calling,” Elizée—who is known for her impeccable style and collaborations with Mango, styling Angel Reese, and more—says.
As for Blue? The artist, from Cedar Hill, Texas, keeps busy with DJing for the likes of Boiler Room and Black House Radio. Not only that, you can find his photography and illustration work for Brent Faiyaz, Calvin Klein, and more. “I love that I’m able to find success through curiosity. Also, especially with music, I love that I’m able to express myself and connect to others at the same time,” he chimes in on the call.
The Brooklyn-based couple’s meet-cute was something of, as the kids say on TikTok, a slow burn. The two originally met at Elizée’s apartment after her roommate invited Blue to DJ their house party. Then, during fashion week in February 2018, the two ran into each other as Blue was leaving an event Elizée was attending. “I complimented her hair and kept it pushing,” he says. “When he walked away, I turned to my friend Milton and said, ‘Blue said he likes my hair. He loves me,’” she recalls with a laugh. “He was like, ‘you’re crazy.’”
Fast forward to a night out at one of Blue’s sets, Elizée perched by the booth with her besties. He made it known to her friend, Banna, that he wanted to dance with Elizée—eventually coming out onto the dance floor to do so. “I just remember thinking, ‘I don’t know how to dance with boys. Am I doing this right?’” By the looks of it—their approaching summer wedding and 7 years together under their belt—she wasn’t too shabby.
Being in a long-term relationship, and planning for a wedding, of course, take work. Keeping them afloat, in large part, are their couple-care routines. After all, as Blue says, “If you can’t show up for your relationship and for yourself, you might start to see some conflict.” Elizée adds, “self-care and couple-care allow me to decompress and understand what I’m going through. That way, I can show up properly if we’re having a disagreement.”
Below, ahead of their Valentine’s Day staycation, the creative power couple caught up with us about their couple-care routines, the self-care lessons they’ve learned from one another, and more.
Their favorite couple-care memory
Blue: We had a hot yoga run for a while, which was great. I also loved doing the citibikes when it was warm. That turned our brains off.
Naomi: I cherish our late night talks where we’re super candid with each other. There was one in particular where we were super open with each other and utilized questions online to help discuss hard topics. We also did this one exercise where we just stared into each other’s eyes for about two or three minutes. It felt like we unlocked another layer of connection. It allowed us to be super vulnerable.
Their individual self-care routines
Blue: A lot of my self-care just comes from creativity. So if I’m making beats or music, whether it’s good or bad, it just uplifts my soul. Self-expression I think is my self-care.
Naomi: I love a spa moment—whether it’s going somewhere physically or treating myself at home. I don’t have much time for myself these days. And sometimes it’s just nice to wash your face, put a mask on, put a hair mask in, get into a nice silk pajama, get into bed, watch Real Housewives on half of your screen, and then scroll The Real Real on the other half and just be totally in your own zone.
Their joint wellness routines
Blue: When we can, we love to get massages together or cook together.
Naomi: In other words, I maybe do the salad while I watch him cook.
Blue: With planning a wedding, we’re still figuring out our new rhythm. We’re getting into our flow. We keep running into walls that we don’t necessarily know the solutions to just yet. It’s a new territory we’re facing. Communication is big right now. But I know, as they say, once we look back at it the day after we’re married, it’s all going to make sense.
The products they’ve introduced to one another
Naomi: Blue definitely loves Pharrell’s line, Humanrace. Otherwise, I’ve given him retinol here and there. Body care-wise, I introduced him to the Terra-Tory soap brand which he loves. It’s a great Black-owned brand and we’ve been using it for years. I feel like you’ve kind of always had your own haircare routine.
Blue: I just use yours when you’re not looking. It doesn’t really matter the brand for me. I just use what’s there. Otherwise, I really love the Byredo soap she gets.
Naomi: But for the most part we do our own things product-wise. Where we overlap the most is with the clothing. I’m always stealing his hoodies, especially if he’s away traveling for work. And I remember one time he took my fanny pack before a DJ gig. He styled it as a hat. Everyone kept posting it on their Instagram stories talking about how cool it was. He’s definitely one to experiment with clothing… and he makes it look so cool every time.
The self-care lessons they’ve learned from one another
Naomi: Blue has the best confidence. He’s so sure of himself. He’s also so giving and has all these amazing qualities about him. But he really pours into himself I feel, and allows himself to enjoy the wins. I’ve really admired how he is able to uplift himself and also manifest his aspirations and his dreams.
Also, if he doesn’t know how to do something, he is so willing to learn and is not afraid to do so. The Virgo in me makes me a bit afraid of failure, and that’s something I’m really working on. For him, if he does fail, he takes it as a life lesson to then apply it moving forward to find the success—which he often finds. And he’s just honestly so good at everything he puts his brain to. So I am just thankful I’m with someone that gets it when I can’t.
Blue: What I’ve learned from Naomi on the self-care vibe, is that having a clean and organized space helps your brain. It keeps your brain flowing. Clutter can lead to overthinking. I’m learning I’ve been kind of a rug rat. So she’s taught me the importance of a clean space—it’s allowed my ideas to flow and connect. And I’m really thankful for that.
Credits:
Photographer & stylist: Tyler Okuns
Brands featured:
On Naomi — Zankov sweater, Zankov robe, Gabe Gordon shorts, HYKE sweater + pants set.
On Blue — Camper Lab sweater, Zankov sweater + pants.
