To be married more than 40 years is no small feat. Academy-award-winning actor Denzel Washington and wife Pauletta have done it, and in the process, welcomed four children who work and have found success in Hollywood. It all started back in the late ’70s, when they met on the set of the TV movie Wilma that they both were stars in, but Denzel admitted he didn’t truly see her to get to know her until after filming wrapped. The two ran into each other at a party months later.
“I had talked at that party about going to see a play. I went to see the play, and at intermission the lights came up and she was sitting [there],” he recalled to Kelly Ripa and former co-host Ryan Seacrest. “She said she just happened to go see the play…”
They started dating soon after, and Denzel was so taken with Pauletta he popped the question, a few times, before finally getting the yes he was looking for.
“Why was it twice? Why would I have to ask again?” he asked her during a chat with Access Hollywood in 2013. “Because I said no!” she replied. “You heard it here first!” Denzel answered. “She turned me down, she said no. And since it was three times, that means she turned me down twice.”
But of course, she eventually said yes, and the couple wed in 1983. They’ve managed to stay locked in through the ups and downs of love, and not to mention, a skyrocketing career and all that comes with it.
“What pops into my head: security, food, a beautiful home,” he said of the key to a happy marriage back in 2018. “The difference between a house and a home, it’s a big difference. You can buy a house, but that doesn’t make it a home—and not to say a man can’t make a home a home, but my wife has made our house a home, and raised these beautiful kids, and protected them and sacrificed for them. She did the heavy lifting.”
“We work at it. It’s work,” Pauletta told PEOPLE in 2024. “There are a lot of prayers for strength for staying in a forgiveness mode and both parts, mine and his. But it’s the basic love that we have for each other.”
There’s nothing basic about Denzel’s adoration for his wife, though. As he stated when receiving the AFI Life Achievement Award, she’s “The most important person in my life, [for] 40 years. Forty years of sacrifice, 40 years of forgiveness, of talking about faith, spirituality, love, real love, unwavering love in spite of myself. I would not be alive without Pauletta Washington.”
And where would Black love be without them both? Check out a few images of their beautiful bond from over the years below.
Denzel Washington and wife Pauletta Washington (Photo by Jim Smeal/Ron Galella Collection via Getty Images)
Denzel Washington and Pauletta Washington during 64th Annual Academy Awards at Dorothy Chandler Pavilion in Los Angeles, California, United States. (Photo by Ron Galella/Ron Galella Collection via Getty Images)
Denzel Washington and Pauletta Washington during 58th Annual New York Film Critics Circle Awards at Rainbow Room at Rockefeller Center in New York City, New York, United States. (Photo by Ron Galella/Ron Galella Collection via Getty Images)
Denzel Washington and Pauletta Washington during “The Preacher’s Wife” New York City Premiere at Ziegfeld Theater in New York City, New York, United States. (Photo by Ron Galella/Ron Galella Collection via Getty Images)
HOLLYWOOD – MARCH 23: Actor Denzel Washington and wife Pauletta attend the 75th Annual Academy Awards at the Kodak Theater on March 23, 2003 in Hollywood, California. (Photo by Kevin Winter/Getty Images)
WESTWOOD, CA – APRIL 18: (L to R) Actor Denzel Washington and Pauletta Washington attend the film premiere of “Man on Fire” at the Mann National Theater on April 18, 2004 in Westwood, California. (Photo by Frederick M. Brown/Getty Images).
LOS ANGELES – OCTOBER 29: Actor Denzel Washington and his wife Pauletta Pearson arrive at an industry screening of Universal Picture’s and Imagine Entertainment’s “American Gangster” at the ArcLight Cinemas on October 29, 2007 in Los Angeles. California. (Photo by Kevin Winter/Getty Images)
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HOLLYWOOD, CA. – DECEMBER 11: Actor Denzel Washington and wife Pauletta arrive at the Weinstein Company premiere of “The Great Debaters” at the Arclight Theater on December 11, 2007 in Hollywood, California. (Photo by Jeffrey Mayer/Wireimage)
HOLLYWOOD – FEBRUARY 21: Pauletta Washington and Denzel Washington attend the Ebony Pre-Oscar Celebration on February 21, 2008 at Boulevard 3 in Hollywood, California, (Photo by Arnold Turner/WireImage)
BEVERLY HILLS, CA – OCTOBER 25: Actor Denzel Washington (R) and his wife Pauletta Washington pose during the cocktail reception at the 30th anniversary Carousel of Hope Ball to benefit the Barbara Davis center for childhood diabetes held at the Beverly Hilton Hotel on October 25, 2008 in Beverly Hills, California. (Photo by Kevin Winter/Getty Images)
(EXCLUSIVE, Premium Rates Apply) NEW YORK – JUNE 13: (EXCLUSIVE COVERAGE; PREMIUM RATES APPLY) Denzel Washington and Pauletta Washington in the audience at the 64th Annual Tony Awards at Radio City Music Hall on June 13, 2010 in New York City. (Photo by Kevin Mazur/WireImage)
NEW YORK – NOVEMBER 10: Actor Denzel Washington and Pauletta Washington attend The 2010 Princess Grace Awards Gala at Cipriani 42nd Street on November 10, 2010 in New York City. (Photo by Pascal Le Segretain/Getty Images for Princess Grace Foundation)
NEW YORK, NY – FEBRUARY 07: Denzel Washington and Pauletta Washington attend the “Safe House” premiere at the SVA Theater on February 7, 2012 in New York City. (Photo by Dimitrios Kambouris/WireImage)
NEW YORK, NY – JULY 29: Pauletta Pearson Washington and actor Denzel Washington attend the “2 Guns” New York Premiere at SVA Theater on July 29, 2013 in New York City. (Photo by Jim Spellman/WireImage)
NEW YORK, NY – DECEMBER 19: Pauletta Washington and Denzel Washington attend the “Fences” New York Screening at Frederick P. Rose Hall, Jazz at Lincoln Center on December 19, 2016 in New York City. (Photo by Mike Coppola/Getty Images)
HOLLYWOOD, CA – FEBRUARY 26: Actor/filmmaker Denzel Washington (R) and Pauletta Washington attend the 89th Annual Academy Awards at Hollywood & Highland Center on February 26, 2017 in Hollywood, California. (Photo by George Pimentel/FilmMagic)
HOLLYWOOD, CALIFORNIA – JUNE 06: Denzel Washington (L) and Pauletta Washington attend the 47th AFI Life Achievement Award Honoring Denzel Washington After Party at Sunset Tower Hotel on June 06, 2019 in Hollywood, California. (Photo by Michael Kovac/Getty Images for AFI)
US actor Denzel Washington (R) and wife Pauletta Washington attend the 94th Oscars at the Dolby Theatre in Hollywood, California on March 27, 2022. (Photo by ANGELA WEISS / AFP) (Photo by ANGELA WEISS/AFP via Getty Images)
HOLLYWOOD, CALIFORNIA – NOVEMBER 18: (L-R) Pauletta Washington and Denzel Washington attend the “Gladiator II” Los Angeles Premiere at the TCL Chinese Theatre on November 18, 2024, in Hollywood, California. (Photo by Jesse Grant/Getty Images for Paramount Pictures)
LOS ANGELES, CALIFORNIA – NOVEMBER 19: (L-R) Pauletta Washington and Denzel Washington attend Netflix’s “The Piano Lesson” LA premiere at The Egyptian Theatre Hollywood on November 19, 2024 in Los Angeles, California. (Photo by Roger Kisby/Getty Images for Netflix)
