Today is National Orgasm Day, which is a day that honors the importance of sexual climax. But why is this day relevant for Black women specifically? Well, in a world that can often feel heavy, taking the time to celebrate and prioritize our pleasure is an act of resistance, honor, self-love, and self-care, suggests resident ESSENCE sex expert Nikquan Lewis. She shares, “Black women are complex beings. We are beautiful, strong superheroes you call when you want the job done. Often, we wear these hats 24-7, and taking them off can be challenging because many of us have learned that if we don’t do all the things, who will?”
Lewis continues, “Every day, we navigate a world full of unique challenges, from racism to sexism and everything in between. That’s why it’s more important than ever to embrace our birthright to pleasure, including the joys of orgasms. Prioritizing orgasms is not only about physical satisfaction but also about emotional and mental well-being, which we must prioritize to care for ourselves and manage the stresses of life.”
She believes by prioritizing orgasms, Black women can enjoy a variety of benefits. Whether single or partnered, orgasms are an amazing way to connect with ourselves and enhance our overall well-being.
So, we should embrace owning our pleasure, prioritize it, and commit to a pleasure-filled life, especially if we aren’t partnered, as single women still deserve the same amount (if not more) of orgasms. Here are some reasons why sexual climax matters, especially for Black women, according to Lewis.
Mental Health and Stress Relief
Life can be a lot for us, and orgasms release several hormones, including oxytocin, dopamine, and endorphins, which act as natural ways to increase mood. For Black women, we often face unique stressors; regular orgasms can be a key factor in managing mental health by reducing stress and anxiety levels.
Owning Our Pleasure
Let’s be real, y’all—pleasure is our birthright, and prioritizing it is a form of self-love and empowerment. It’s a way to celebrate our bodies and our right to experience joy and satisfaction, especially in a world that often overlooks our needs.
Health Benefits
Regular orgasms release hormones that can boost your immune system and improve circulation.
Sweet Dreams and Pain Relief
Do you have difficulty sleeping or chronic pain? Guess what—orgasms can help with that, too! The hormones released can improve the quality of our sleep and offer pain relief, making it a natural solution worth exploring.
Deepening Connections
For those in relationships, sharing intimate moments and orgasms can strengthen the emotional connection with your partner. A healthy foundation and sex life help to build trust and connection, making your relationship stronger and more fulfilling.
Celebrating Our Sexuality
Openly talking about and celebrating orgasms helps to normalize Black women’s sexuality and works to dismantle the shame we often experience that doesn’t belong to us. Let’s continue to break down stereotypes and embrace our full selves, including our sexual desires and needs.
For the Single Ladies
Everyone should enjoy orgasms; they are not just for those in relationships. For single women, self-pleasure is an amazing way to explore what feels good and to connect with your sensual side. It’s a journey of self-discovery and empowerment that builds confidence, self-awareness, and sexual insight. Here are a few tips:
Intimate Explorations: Prioritize intimacy with self. Take the time to learn what pleases you by exploring your body. This could include experimenting with various toys. Use vibrators or other aids to enhance your experiences and play around with different sensations, speeds, and pressures.
Create a Sexy Yet Comfortable Environment: Set the mood with soft lighting, your favorite R&B playlist, or even a relaxing bath. The more comfortable and relaxed you are, the better the experience.
Mindfulness and Presence: Focus on the moment and the journey you’re taking to seek pleasure. Being fully present can intensify pleasure and deepen your connection with yourself.