Jonathan Majors recently revealed that he was sexually abused by both men and women beginning at the age of 9. In 2023, he was accused of domestic violence by his ex-girlfriend. So, it has us thinking, are victims of child abuse more likely to become abusers?
We know many high-profile Black men, such as R. Kelly, experienced abuse as children and later went on to abuse others. Recently, the embattled singer has been accused of sexually abusing his daughter, along with hundreds of other young girls and women.
Abuse of boys and men is not something we often discuss in Black communities. However, data from the National Intimate Partner and Sexual Violence Survey indicates nearly 7.7 million Black men reported ever having experienced sexual violence, physical violence, or stalking by an intimate partner in their lifetime. Intimate partner violence, whether physical, sexual, emotional, economic, psychological, or technological, is a pattern of abusive behavior in any relationship in which one partner gains or maintains power and control over their partner. Research shows that exposure to violence or abuse as a child is related to increased perpetration of IPV.
Black boys and men are among the most understudied and underserved groups in healthcare. Yet, their mental, emotional, and physical needs are increasingly critical to address. Expanding access to gender-inclusive support services and reducing stigma around seeking care are essential steps needed to address these issues comprehensively—improving access and awareness around trauma-informed care and therapy to promote healing. By addressing trauma and fostering open dialogue, we can prevent cycles of abuse and build more robust and resilient communities.
Be a man about it!
Growing up, Black boys are taught what masculinity is or how to be a man. They hear messages about the importance of being tough, not crying, never backing down, and relying only on themselves. This can breed beliefs in toxic masculinity, which is a harmful set of behaviors or beliefs that devalue anything perceived as weak or feminine. This mindset can pressure boys to adhere to unrealistic standards of strength and withdraw emotionally rather than expressing themselves or asking for help. Black boys are often viewed as older and not treated as children. This phenomenon is known as adultification. The intersection of toxic masculinity (i.e., loss of their virginity is a rite of passage into manhood) and adultification (i.e., viewing and treating Black boys as men) perpetuates early sexualization and hypersexualization of Black boys.
Unfortunately, toxic masculinity and adultification are encouraged and facilitated by parents or, more specifically, fathers who solicit sex from older women for their underage sons, as admitted by rapper Boosie Badazz. Some believe that this practice ensures boys remain heterosexual and promotes manliness. However, this normalizes sexual abuse, reinforces the hypersexuality of Black boys, and distorts Black boys’ understanding of age-appropriate sex.
Does unhealed trauma create predators?
Being a survivor of abuse is not an excuse for abusing others, but experiences of abuse may explain why these men perpetrate violence towards others. The National Sexual Violence Resource Center reports that more than 27.8% of male survivors who reported raping someone experienced their first rape when they were 10 years of age or younger. As the saying goes, “Hurt people, hurt people.”
For Blacks, this exposure to violence contributes to disparities in physical and mental health. Unaddressed trauma, especially sexual trauma, may show up in destructive behaviors such as violence towards others, substance abuse, and perpetuating cycles of abuse that include IPV. While not every Black man who experiences sexual abuse will abuse their partners, the alarming amount of IPV that still occurs within our community demands action. But how can this be achieved for Black men?
One of the barriers to addressing this problem is the lack of conversation about IPV and violence among Black men. Men need to see role models who are healing from trauma and are actively challenging the ideals of toxic masculinity that perpetuate cycles of violence. Black men like Tyler Perry and Terry Crews have stood up to tell their stories of abuse. Their experiences, like others, demand change within the Black community. Normalizing emotional vulnerability and seeking help among men without fear of judgment or loss of masculinity is an essential step in reframing the conversation. Black men can actively participate in the healing of their communities by creating support systems centered around collective healing. Communities and families play an essential role in protecting Black boys and girls by fostering safe environments and encouraging open conversations about abuse, consent, and emotional well-being to break the cycle of violence.
We need to dismantle harmful stereotypes that reinforce silence among victims of abuse and discourage the vulnerability of Black men. Being vulnerable does not mean being weak. Seeking help does not take from your strength; it adds to it, so let’s talk about it.
Alyssa Debra is an M.D.- Ph.D. student at the University of Illinois Chicago College of Medicine
Natasha Crooks is an Assistant Professor at the University of Illinois Chicago and a member of The OpEd Alumni Project
