Being that I like to think I’m still young-ish as a thirtysomething, and I’m a mother, I don’t like to play respectability politics when it comes to how people choose to raise their children in this day and age. If kids are healthy, happy, well-functioning beings, then I’m all for parents doing what they think is best with their children. But sometimes, I see things that leave me hesitant to turn a blind eye. I like to be open-minded, but it isn’t false when people say that we sometimes try to normalize some things that just aren’t ok — and it’s certainly not ok to do so all in the name of being “fun,” “lit” and “cool” parents and guardians.
I follow Yung Miami on social media and enjoy her personality. I’m also fond of her as a mother, from the sweet parties she throws for her two children, son Jai and daughter Summer, to the fact that she keeps them out of the spotlight more often than not. So I was a little taken aback when I saw a recent video of her 10-year-old son throwing money at dancers at the Rolling Loud festival in Miami. She wasn’t with him at the time, as he was hanging out with the rapper’s group mate and friend JT, and JT’s boyfriend, rapper Lil Uzi Vert. JT was actually the one who shared the video, calling herself a “cool auntie,” which now has people talking.
Being that he’s young, he’s handling money, being hyped up, and being with his “cool auntie” and her famous friends, Jai is all smiles. He’s not in danger or anything in the literal sense, but he is in a scene that he doesn’t belong in. As a reminder, he’s 10.
Being that she didn’t post the video, and her son was not in her care in that moment, the best way for Yung Miami to have handled this probably was to say nothing publicly. But she did decide to respond, and what she had to say was a bit baffling.
She followed up by saying the moment was “Raw af,” and shared this tweet:
She also thanked JT for showing her son a good time.
Again, I’m not trying to lean on monolithic ways to be as people and parents, but there are some things you’re not going to get me believe are trends we need to make a regular thing, and that includes having a young child throw money at dancers shaking a– at a music festival.
I’m not mad at her for wanting to protect her child from the judgments of people on social media for a situation she wasn’t present for, but I also think doubling down on this, as someone with influence, is problematic. It’s also an interesting shift, this idea of what she’s ok with her son being exposed to considering that she’s spoken in the past on not wanting her daughter, 3, to be exposed to certain things that she’s embraced as a performer and grown up seeing.
“I want her raised totally different. I don’t even want her to see the light of day like that. Like I just really want her to be like, level-headed, a school girl and just on a whole other wave,” she said of being a protective parent in May. “I kinda was raised different, so I don’t wanna raise her up like how I was raised.”
She added, “You know I’m a city girl, ain’t nothing wrong with it, but I don’t want that for my daughter.”
I get that if your upbringing exposed you to certain things that you shouldn’t have seen, that could influence how you parent. However, Yung Miami made clear that she knows some of the things were inappropriate and doesn’t want that for Summer. But we should have an equally protective spirit for our children, whether they’re girls or boys. At 10 years old, a child may find themselves exposed to certain things online or in school because that’s just the world we live in now and they can’t be in front of us 24/7. But as parents and parental figures, we can’t be the ones exposing our children to those things.
What she’s used to in her career and is witness to is fine for her, because she’s an adult and that’s her world as an entertainer and what she’s embraced as a sexually liberated, independent woman. But the same effort made in not posting her kids publicly should also be applied in ensuring that they are able to stay children as long as possible. Society, through social media have young children attempting to grow up faster than they should, and as their guardians, we should do our best to guard their innocence, not shove them into adult things because we don’t think it’s a big deal or it’s convenient for us if they’re by our sides, even in ill-suited situations and settings.
As mentioned, she would have been better served not saying anything on the matter. However, she chose to, and responded mostly in anger from a place of defensiveness. It happens and I understand why she would feel attacked. But offline, I do really hope that she doesn’t allow a situation like this to be the norm. It’s one thing to put these kids in Rolex watches, iced out necklaces and designer clothes from birth because their parents can afford it and see that as a providing a level of care they couldn’t experience growing up, but in the grand scheme of things, young children just want to enjoy simple things. They need to. If you groom them to enjoy more complex things better suited for adults, then they will grow up faster than they need to. Respectfully, they don’t need to be knee deep in the haunts of the world because that’s what their parents know. Let these kids be kids.