Break Out of Your Dating Rut with Speed Dating

Want to meet more eligible bachelors in one night than you might meet all year? Amber Soletti, co-founder of OnSpeedDating.com, explains how to maximize the number of guys you could make a real connection with through her customized speed dating events. ESSENCE.com:  A lot of women are hesitant to try speed dating. Why should they push past that and show up for an event? AMBER SOLETTI: If you go to a club, you don’t know who’s single and who’s not. Speed dating is like going to a club where everyone is single and looking to meet someone. It’s really great for busy women. You get in front of 10 to 25 singles in one night. And there’s no pressure of someone asking you for your number [because you go to our website after the event to see if you’re interested in someone who’s interested in you.] ESSENCE.com: What’s different about your New York speed dating events? SOLETTI: I feel like the quantity aspect was covered with other sites, but the quality is missing from them. We have over 70 themed events. So whatever you’re into, you have a good chance of finding it on our site. If you’re a man who loves Black women, we have “B.A.P. (Black African Princess)” night. If you like tall men, we have a “Size Matters” night for men over 6’1″. ESSENCE.com: I’ve heard that the events women rush to sign up for aren’t the same as the ones men rush to sign up for. How do I pick an event where a ton of guys will show up? SOLETTI: Men tend to go for events like “Gentlemen Prefer Blondes” (for blonde women and the men who love them). “Cougar/Boy Toy” (for women over 35 and men under 30) is super-popular with men. “Hot for Teacher” (for women educators) and “Nurse Betty” (for women who are nurses, paramedics and EMTs) are also popular. Men also really like signing up for our “Hung” night (for men with big packages). I thought I’d have to turn women away for that, but the waitlist for men on that event is up to 100. It must be an ego thing. ESSENCE.com: What should you talk about in the three minutes you have to chat with each guy? SOLETTI: The themes lend themselves to conversation. Just don’t dominate the conversation. It should be an even exchange. And don’t get into anything heavy like a religious debate. If he meets your basic requirements, go online and set up a date. ESSENCE.com: Anything else readers should consider about speed dating? SOLETTI: Life is short. You should try something at least once. If anything, you’ll at least have a good story to tell.