Summer vacations call for viewing new places and sights, but why stop at observing landmarks when you could also explore in the bedroom with your partner during vacation? While you may be busy planning your summer travel itinerary, be sure to pencil in some time for intimacy with your partner, and try something new to turn up the heat on your sexcapades. For steamy thought starters, check out tips from our resident sex expert and licensed clinical psychologist, Dr. Jacqueline Sherman, below.
Try Homemade Porn: Watching porn can be a major turn-on, but creating it will turn up the heat on your next sexcapade! You can get as creative as possible, including role-play, dress-up, or creating a sexy storyline. The key is not to overthink it too much and remain present once you hit record on your device. A pro tip is to make eye contact with the camera occasionally. Be sure to create this experience with someone you trust, and discuss your sexual boundaries before you hit record.
Experiment with Orgasm Denial: We all enjoy a good orgasm, but denying one can take sex to another level! Orgasm denial is the practice of intentionally refraining from experiencing an orgasm. One partner (who is dominant) typically orders their partner (who is being submissive) not to orgasm. For many people, the power of controlling your partner(s) orgasm can be a major turn-on. The idea is to bring your partner to a high state of erotic arousal, then add an element of control that will blow their mind. This technique will have your partner(s) begging for more pleasure, and you can control if they come.
Use the Kivin Method: Forget the traditional way you’ve been receiving oral sex. This technique will expand your pleasure potential and increase your sense of novelty! The Kivin Method is a style of cunnilingus (an oral sex act involving a person stimulating the vulva using the mouth, tongue, and lips) where the receiver gives oral sex from the side. This allows for a different type of stimulation that can feel much more intense and pleasurable. The partner providing oral sex is in a position that is perpendicular to the receiving partner, creating a T shape. This side-to-side stimulation technique intensifies pleasure for vulva owners because the clitoris receives stimulation different from the usual up-and-down motion typically used during oral. Utilizing this technique also allows for more of the vulva to be stimulated, as the focus is not just on the clitoris and clitoral hood.
Have Sex Outdoors: With many places experiencing heat waves this summer, the weather is perfect for an outdoor sexcapade! Think sweaty, humid, slippery, and wet. When thinking about having sex outdoors, you want to keep your safety in mind. Be sure to engage in sexy play in an outdoor area that allows for privacy and discretion (i.e., a cabin in the woods, a private beach, your private pool or patio, your backyard, etc.). Breathing in the fresh air, smelling the outdoors, and being stimulated by the sight of the environment around you will certainly intensify your sensuality (the process of being presently connected to your body, senses, and feelings of pleasure). Pro Tip: sex outdoors in the rain can add a layer of eroticism and is a surefire way of creating a sexcapade you will never forget!
Have a Sex Toy Shopping Date: There is no foreplay hotter than sex toy shopping with your partner(s) for your next sexcapade! Make this a date night, where you dress up and head to a novelty store or sex shop before dinner. Be open-minded and non-judgmental as you explore toys together. Lean into you your curiosity while there, and ask questions as necessary. Pro Tip: vibrating panties are an excellent dinner accessory. Consider purchasing your favorite vibrating panty while shopping, then slipping into them before dinner begins. Give your partner the remote control, and experience the most pleasurable dinner of your life!
Use a Ball Gag: Everyone raves about being loud in the bedroom, but there is something erotic about being speechless during sex. There is a sexy submissiveness to wanting to scream during sexy play, especially when you’ve been forced to remain silent. Gags intensify a sexual experience by limiting a partner from talking during sex. For example, ball gags are sex toys that have become increasingly popular. They are round balls that can fit into one’s mouth, made of rubber, silicone, or plastic. They have adjustable straps around the head, and the ball sits behind the teeth. Gags enhance sexy play by inhibiting the ability to speak, expanding how much we feel in the body, and relaxing.
Try Bondage: Ever fantasized about tying up and teasing your partner(s)? Or the reverse? If so, you are certainly not alone! This common fantasy will turn up the heat on any summer sexcapade. If you are a bondage beginner, you can experiment by consensually tying, binding, or restraining your partner to build erotic stimulation through sexual control. You can try this with a rope or handcuffs. It is recommended to start slow with someone that you trust. Be sure to discuss a safe word before engaging in bondage play.