'RHoDC': Stacie Turner on Finding Her Birth Parents

Last week, “Real Housewives of D.C.” cast member Stacie Turner told us about her trip to Paris with her husband. While in France, they met up with the Salahis — also known as the White House party crashers — and the couples had a wonderful time. This week, Stacie chatted with ESSENCE.com about discovering her birth mother, the Salahis, and Catherine “Cat” Ommanney calling herself a racist… ESSENCE.com: Why did you share such a personal story with Michaele Salahi in Paris about finding your adoptive parents? STACIE TURNER: We were in Paris with a number of family and friends and I felt comfortable sharing it with Michaele. While in Paris, I saw a different side of her than the other ladies have. ESSENCE.com: After finding your mother, you realized that your birth was a secret? TURNER: This search has occurred over a period of eight years, because I wasn’t focused on it and needed some medical history. I ended up locating my birth mother and corresponded with her — the reality is that she has a whole different life now. She’s never shared with anyone that she had a child, that’s a secret. I contacted her and I have no interest in divulging her secret but I also have the expectation that she would share with me who my birth father is and any information about where I come from. She was unwilling to do that, likely out of fear of her being found out. ESSENCE.com: Were you hurt that your mother withheld information about your father? TURNER: I totally took it personally. On one hand, I couldn’t be more appreciative that she gave me up for adoption which allowed me to have a better life. But given that it’s 40 years later, she should be willing to share some information about my birth father. In this week’s episode, I find out that he doesn’t even know that I exist. That made me more interested in finding him so we can both decide if we want to have a relationship. A person has the right to know if they have a child or not. ESSENCE.com: Are you comfortable sharing such a personal struggle with the “Real Housewives of D.C.” cameras? TURNER: I don’t have any negative feelings about being adopted, I think it’s the most selfless thing that a mother can do and the most loving thing another family could do. My search for my birth parents was something real and was happening at the time of taping. There’s no way I could do a reality show about me and not show something that’s taking up the lion’s share of my time. ESSENCE.com: During the dinner for Ted the hair stylist, Lynda made a comment about the Supremes and your friend Erika wasn’t impressed. What happened? TURNER: There’s always some racial comment being made at these dinners. I think that the ladies are sometimes insensitive about these things. Why, when we talk about integrating salons or the Supremes, do we have to start talking like, ‘yeah, girlfriend…’ and change the whole gesture of how you talk? I think that’s what my friend Erika was reacting to. ESSENCE.com: Why does the word “racist” keep popping up with Cat? TURNER: No one has ever called her racist, she’s come up with that on her own. Why are you self-proclaiming yourself a racist if you’re not? I’m really sick of it because it’s just so silly. However, what was interesting to me was her use of the word “colored.” She’s British so I don’t think that she understands that people would think that that was offensive, but she would if she knew the history around that word and how people fought not to be called that. ESSENCE.com: What do you think about the Salahis not paying for Paul’s party? TURNER: Oh, that was crazy! I was shocked. That was just so inappropriate, horrible and tacky. Here is where all these conflicting stories pop up about Michaele. If I look at how she has treated Jason and I in Paris, then I hear about her not paying for Paul’s party, I start to wonder, who are these people? ESSENCE.com: What can we expect this week? TURNER: This week we go to the Oasis winery, owned by Michaele and Tariq, for a grape stomp. It’s funny because you can tell that back in its day the winery was a sophisticated operation. It just clearly hasn’t been functioning for a couple of years and as a result it’s showing neglect. So we’re coming to have a grape stomp, but there aren’t any grapes on the vine.